Refracted Neurons

Before I start my list, a word of advice to all virgins out there: if you dress like a skank it will put you in uncomfortable situations. Your typical guy will be horrified that you don't want to have sex with him. He will be asking himself, "Am I inferior?" You will be horrified that he wants to have sex with you. You will be asking yourself, "Do I LOOK like a skank?" So here are a few basic rules to follow: 1) Clothing should not look like it is painted on, unless it really is painted on. 2) Your hair should never be longer than your dress or skirt. If possible, wear a floor length skirt. If this does not solve your problem, wear your hair up. 3) Wonderbras are up there with immaculate conception. Avoid both if possible. 4) Beware of skorts (AKA skirt/short combos). Although they seem modest, they have a nasty habit of riding up and inadvertently exposing the rear. This can lead to other unpleasant events such as exorcism. 5) You must own a calf length ...

1. The Cheat is not dead. 2. A letter from an old friend. 3. Dancing at an office party. 4. Seeing my parents again. 5. Animals! The coffee and the alive kind. 6. Getting a bruise from a mock fist fight, then hitting the person who bruised me with a (new) toilet brush. 7. The song "He has made me glad" because He has. 8. Fuzzy things. 9. Not knowing what binary is and not caring. 10. Rain. 

Amala picks melted cheese off things. G hates raisins, prunes, Cheese Nips, fabric softener, lotion, and playing cards. Platano picks onions off everything. J hates all condiments except Ketchup, jam, and a few others. Ob and Hez are vegans. My sister is allergic to cheese and crab. My mom doesn't like food that's too spicy. My dad hates stewed tomatoes. KM won't eat any meat except fish. The Hebrews had very restricted diets and they were God's chosen people. Jesus didn't eat pork either. E, who was in the military, doesn't like the food on her plate to touch other food on her plate. I've known a plethora of people who don't like olives, especially green ones. N wouldn't eat a cheeto with cheese wiz on it. I won't eat a lot of things. Amala likes orange suckers. G likes vienna sausages. Platano likes all kinds of foods. J also likes vienna sausage. Ob and Hez eat weird green things (semiola?). My sister likes tabuli. My da...