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Happy Birthday MoM!

"I'm mad because! I have rabies. I'm really friendly and then I bite your leg, froth at the mouth, and die."-Me, circa 1997, but still true today.
"If you have a venereal disease, wear a condom. If you spit, wear a sheild."-My mom after learning that someone accidentally spit in my face.

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Short Story: Distraction

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